Breaking Free from Limiting Beliefs as a Parent of a child with Autism.

When I first received my child’s ASD diagnosis, I thought I had finally found some answers, some understanding of the challenges we had been facing. But what I wasn’t prepared for were the emotions that followed: grief, anger, confusion, fear. Instead of being met with guidance and support,

“I found myself thrust into a world that expected me to “fix” my child rather than understand them. And like so many parents in my position, I fell into that trap.”

I booked every therapy imaginable, enrolled in countless programs, and sought out expert after expert, all in an attempt to give my child the best chance at success. But at what cost? I now look back and realise that in my desperate search for solutions, I had ignored my own emotions.

“I had suppressed my hurt, my pain, my feelings of unworthiness and not being good enough. I had hidden them away for the sake of my child.”

The world does not equip caregivers to process these emotions. There is no roadmap, no real guidance on how to navigate this journey.

And because of that, we lose ourselves. We over-serve, over-function, and become consumed by meeting the needs of others. We believe that if we do more, give more, sacrifice more, then maybe, just maybe it will be enough.

Someone recently told me I was a people pleaser. My immediate reaction was to dismiss it, after all, I’ve never been one to seek validation from others. But then I realised there’s another form of pleasing:

the emotional dependency of others on us. We take on their burdens, anticipate their needs, and make sure everything runs smoothly, not because we seek approval but because we feel it’s our responsibility. We mistake this for love, for care. But in reality, we are neglecting ourselves in the process.

Our journey as a family has evolved. We went from seeing our child as someone who needed to be “healed” to realising there was never anything wrong with them in the first place. We moved from feeling excluded, fighting for awareness, and demanding change, to understanding that the real issue was how society viewed our child,not our child themselves. We started to see how nutrition, nervous system regulation, and trauma responses all played a role.

We learned that ASD is not just a brain condition as once thought, but a whole-body experience. And most importantly, we learned to embrace our child exactly as they are.

But in that process, I lost myself.

No amount of “days for mums with kids on the spectrum” could fix what needed to be healed within me. Those moments of self-care, while nice, were only temporary.

True self-care isn’t about spa days or coffee dates; it’s about reclaiming the parts of ourselves that we’ve abandoned. It’s about sleep hygiene, nourishing our bodies, showing ourselves the same kindness and compassion that we so freely give to our children.

“It’s about modeling these behaviours so our children learn that even in their most difficult moments, they, too, can find self-compassion and resilience.”

If I could go back and give my past self one piece of advice, it would be this: Everything you need is already within you. You just need to know how to connect with it. That’s why I created the Carers Package, because I know firsthand what it feels like to pour from an empty cup. And I know how important it is to break free from the limiting beliefs that hold us back.

Many of us avoid or deny our emotions. Others emotionally detach. Some over-serve to the point of exhaustion, seeking self-worth through their caregiving. Others carry anger, blame, shame, and guilt. But no matter where you fall on that spectrum, the reality is the same:

“We cannot continue to serve from depletion. We cannot keep pushing ourselves beyond our limits and expect to thrive.”

Healing starts with us.

When we uncover the root cause of our beliefs, when we release the emotions that have been weighing us down, we step into a place of empowerment. Our perspective shifts. We create better boundaries. Through somatic practices, we find safety in our bodies, allowing us to regulate in moments of stress. We build emotional resilience, deepen our self-compassion, and ultimately, we change not just for ourselves, but for our children.

This is the real work.

This is where true healing happens.

And it starts with us the caregivers, the parents, the ones who have always been enough, even when we didn’t believe it.

If I could rewind time and know what I know now, I would have started by working on myself first. That realisation led me to create the Carers Essential Package, designed for parents and caregivers who feel lost, overwhelmed, and disconnected from themselves. It’s a way to reclaim your sense of self, release limiting beliefs, and build the emotional resilience needed to support your child without losing yourself in the process.

I invite you to explore more about this journey by The Cost of Isolation: Supporting connection esp with young autistic males, and learning more with our Carers Essential Package or our Sensory Kids Webinar Series today.